LISTENING IN

What is the difference between being nosey, eavesdropping and deliberately overhearing someones conversation? I love doing all three! In fact listening to other people's conversations can be very encouraging and challenging.

Well, that's what happened to me yesterday. I was deliberately minding my own business when a dad and his son came in to the room I was in and the dad started talking - very loudly - to his young son. Sometimes when things like this happen the words used can be hurtful, condemning and aggressive but this conversation was totally different. For 3-4 minutes the dad kept telling his son that he had done really well, that he was very proud of him and encouraging him to keep working hard and achieve even more. It was a truly beautiful conversation and made a change from some that I overhear.

I was trying to imagine how the little boy was feeling as his dad heaped praise on him. I couldn't see his face but I imagine that he was smiling, felt very excited and it would encourage him to keep trying even harder next time.

There is no substitute for encouragement, for building other people up, for cheering others on and standing with them shoulder to shoulder whatever it is they are doing or involved with.

I remember Bill Hybels saying that before you point out someones faults say nine good, encouraging things to them. His theory is that by the time you get to the 10th sentence, the fault-finding one, you'll have forgotten what it was anyway!

Now, there is certainly a place for pointing out error, faults, concerns and bad behaviour, but if that is said in the context of encouragement then perhaps grace and truth can live together in an environment where growth takes place.

Those are the sort of conversations I want to hear more and more and also take part in more and more.